By - EmperorBrettavius
The people who used to say that were conquered by people who say “the pen is mightier than the sword”.
"I have found that whoever wields the sword decides who holds the pen." - Lucas Grey
I’ve found that whoever holds the pen dictates what the sword holder gets paid. Or if they keep the privilege of breathing
By consequence, the one with the better sword dictates that with the lesser by canceling out both pen terms, we’ve gone from deep to barbaric
Is that a Hitman reference?
“Those who hold the money, control the pen, the sword, and the penises of popes”
I will always see the SNL skit Celebrity jeopardy where Sean Connery asked for “penis mightier for $500 Alex”.
I'll take "Le Tits Now" for $400
Let's see how much you've wagered...
"Suck it Trebek"?
You’re shitting on a goldmine, Trebek!
Anal bum covers
The rapists for $200
Suck it, Trebek!
"And you wagered eleventy billion dollars. That's not a number"
Ruff, the way your mother likes it.
Anyway, I forget the rest but your mother’s a whore
Give me Bon Ape Tit for 1000
I've always wanted to hear Sean Connery ask someone to sit on his face .
"Not a fan of the ladies are you Trebek"?
The penis mightier, you say?
The penis mightier?? I'll take 2 please.
Well in duel, ill give you the pen
“Whoever said that the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons”- Douglas MacArthur
I'm sure, no one remembers, "your mom wears combat boots.:
Is she in the armed services?
No its from the fifties, " my dad can beat up your dad." Yeah " your mom wears combat boots,". Actually before women were allowed in combat. But served admirably as nurses.
"Your dad wishes he could be half the man your mom is" was what I heard in the 90s
Scottish here, our closest equivalent is “yer maw’s got baws”
I had an uncle who was half Scotch; he talked funny, too.
I don't know where you're from (or if it makes a difference) but I think the preferred word for a person from Scotland is 'Scottish'. 'Scotch' is for things like whisky, pine and eggs.
It's literally the Scottish equivalent of the P and J words used for Pakistani and Japanese according to wikipedia
Nobody who has ever or will ever live has been "Scotch".
What about Scotch Johnson?
Simple but effective.
much better way of putting it.
occasionally we go with "yer ma.......is yer da" no one truly knows what this means but it ends most arguments in school
It's calling your mother a camp follower or whore for the military. In areas of combat that also had overtones of treason. It's a pretty harsh insult that has nothing to do with nurses.
Pretty much means your mom is a whore for the military.
My favorite like that was "Your mother swims out to battleships."
rihanna changed it to “sticks and stones may break my bones but chains and whips excite me“
I’m in my 50s and knew that version as kid.
Edit: that version of the saying, not of the song.
Yeah, I bought a bumper sticker of it in the late 90s, Rihanna didn't come up with it.
Sixty-four here, I think that phrase is older than I am.
Didn’t know there was another version
Remember Weird Science? They are going to a Swarė, whats a Sware? You know chip's, dips, chains, whips?
I think you mean soirée, but I could be wrong.
NANANANANA CUM ON!!!
CAUSE I MAY BE BAD, BUT I’M PERFECTLY GOOD AT IT!!
SEX IN THE AIR, I DON'T CARE, I LOVE THE SMELL OF IT
I like it, like it…
I had no idea that's what she said in that song until today lol
Yeah, nah. That verse was around before she was even born.
Therapy became popularized and we realized that childhood trauma was an actual thing
We started holding people accountable for what they said.
Yes. But unfortunately, we've also allowed people to abuse the notion of "being offended" and it has become weaponized. So now many people in public positions are at the mercy of the most thin skinned member of their audience. Who could absolutely claiming victim status in order to fuck someone else up over something minor. For example, the Adult Entertainer, August Ames mentioned on Twitter once that she wasn't comfortable having sex with bisexual male performers because she was concerned about contracting diseases. Which, while potentially homophobic, was also her right to choose who she wanted to have sex with. After all, it's her body, her choice, right? but she got harassed online because people immediately jumped to the conclusion that she was a bigot, and it lead to her committing suicide. I sincerely doubt that everyone who harassed and bullied her was actually truly offended by what she said, but they didn't care, they just wanted to drag her because her personal preference for who she has sex with wasn't compatible with their political beliefs.
And it's not just queer activists who do this, plenty of right wing shit heads do this sort of stuff too. It's become so cynical to see how much people use the notion of "being offended" by something they disagree with to justify trying to ruin people's lives. there are plenty of things that offend and upset me, but I don't try to destroy others because they have a different point of view than me.
And just to head off critics, I am not saying I condone hate speech or violent threats or anything like that. I just don't think that being mildly upset at a non-violent comment justifies being an asshole.
Very true. It's sad to how people can get so much joy from bringing someone down for a mistake, something we all do. I will never forget Roseanne like really you think she is a racist horrible person. She made a joke in poor taste sure but evil no.
I feel like people look for things that they can justify being offended about as opposed to actually being offended. We should not be judged only on our mistakes and flaws. Compassion is a two way road if you truly believe in compassion.
I think this goes back to when ever a trophy for everyone started though.Everthing isn't about YOU!
August Ames is a striking example, because part of it was that gay and straight porn had *very* different industry standards for using condoms or not using condoms and STD testing. It was a very valid concern that would have been just as valid with any potential coworker who was found to not be following the industry standards she was.
Exactly! But all of her detractors just jumped immediately to "you're a bigot" and bullied her into suicide. What's more offensive in this scenario? Ms. Ames' legitimate concern for her health being compromised by who she worked with or the anonymous crowd of online bullies who harassed her? I would say it's the latter, yet none of them faced any consequences.
I think that the OP doesn't know that therapy takes you to a place where you work through your triggers and also where you don't get as easily offended... or better said, not to easily get angry and if you do, to make it count. One therapist told me that being angry all the time about petty things is exhausting. Anger is a valid emotion that signals an injustice or something that doesn't sit right with you at a fundamental level, but it's exhausting and not good for your health if you don't learn to tame it or if you get angry about everything (this also applies to relationship. Specially relationships. Choose your battles). He said that if something really angers you, assess your initial response, whether it's a valid response (my mom has a hair-trigger so it came up in therapy because I have some traces of that) and if it's not, you need to learn to relax. If it is worth it of your anger, you also need to relax and express what it's making you feel without letting anger dictate how you act (we all know how that goes. Acting while angry). One telling thing is that he told me people like that are either narcisists or have unresolved trauma, which in either case, you have to work it in therapy.
As you said, people from all sides of the political spectrum can get easily offended, but it is not because they learned about therapy, more like they know about therapy and mental health but have never been actually been to therapy, because therapy is not about teaching you create a bubble around you, but about having the tools for dealing with daily life. I agree with you that most controversies lately are blown out of proportion. People get offended way to easily, not only that, they actually go put of they're way to harass people. Take Moses Ingram. I did not like her character or her acting on Obi Wan. I just move on with my life. Some people harassed the actress and sent hate texts. Why would people do that? Just move on. Again, hate speech should be not tolerated, violent speech either, but most speech falls into a very large spectrum of us being humans who disagree... in some cases humans who say dumb shit
“Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can make you believe you deserved it.”
This. People started admitting "the shakes" and "bad nerves" were common and bottling it up until you killed either yourself, your family, or both wasn't the way to go.
Turns out, the real pains were the words we heard along the way.
That was something your mom would tell you to say just to get you to stop crying. it never really was believed or made any difference in anyone's life.
I heard it used mostly as a childhood version of “oh yeah? come at me, bro!”
Basically one kid telling the other to STFU, or bring it. (This would have been early ‘80s).
We learned from science
Mental health is as important as physical health
The concept that one can be strong and ignore it is realistically false
If you have ascended above society in some monk shit you may be the exception
But harassment gets to everyone eventually
This phrase has always put the onus on the recipient of the message -- "Just ignore them and they'll go away." The narrative now is more on the perpetrator -- why should we tolerate people saying hurtful things?
Also, this saying downplays the serious impacts words can have on people -- both in terms of a victim who internalizes the message and takes drastic steps involving self-harm, AND people who are emboldened by others' words to take harmful actions.
Finally, I'd say it was in a time when words "stopped" when you got home -- your bullies stayed out. With social media and texting, we are constantly inundated with messages. Some people literally can't escape the verbal abuse.
Overall, it's not representative of where we are.
It sounds like it was coined by someone very secure with themselves. Don't get me wrong, I want people to be comfortable with themselves and not 'let' ugly and shitty and unprovoked 'words' hurt them.
But if that foundation isn't there and been nourished and supported through most of their lives it's going to be hard to just pick up on your own. My dad would complain constantly that we were nothing but financial and annoying burdens. It fucked up my own sense of self-worth for a really long time.
Now that I've grown if someone I perceive via actions and behavior tries to insult me I can often brush it off. But that took a *long* time to understand.
Totally! I didn't realize how much I had internalized from childhood until it all kind of exploded, and then I realized "Why does ANY of this matter to me anymore?" It took me until 30 to get there, but it was such a nice feeling.
“Just ignore them and they’ll go away” is such shitty advice too. In grade school I tried my best to keep to myself and avoid bullying, but they only stopped when I stood up for myself and punched them. And I only got to that point when I was in 11th grade. I tried everything but physical confrontation but it was the only thing that worked.
Same for me. Didn't help my mother raised me that fighting is never a solution. But after I handed out my 10th grade beat down, the bullying for the past 11 years stopped instantly.
And that advice only gets propagated because the adults saying it have no conscious memory of actually being a child, and because it actually is possible to avoid people in much of the adult world.
Kind of feels like I'd rather be punched than have something extremely hurtful said to me. I've got a thick skin, but if you get a good cut in, it lingers.
Dang. Nicely phrased. Kudos to you
>"Just ignore them and they'll go away."
This never works. What made the bullies go away was when I broke guy's nose. And suddenly I wasn't an easy target anymore and they left me alone.
Dude, Andrew Jackson shot someone for insulting his wife. People got into duels because someone insulted theirs shoes. Nothing has changed. If anything people are *more* tolerant of people talking shit than in history. Look at how fragile boomers are.
It was was never true, people just now understand
I use “sticks and stones may break my bones but your opinion is trash”
Because we realized emotional abuse is a thing.
I guess people realized that words can be genuinely harmful and suggesting otherwise with a cute succinct phrase is perhaps not the best idea.
Also someone invented armor, making the sticks and stones ineffective at breaking bones.
Yeah. And hammers and guns were invented making sticks and stones obsolete
Stones vs armor is actually pretty effective
Correct, the original phrase is complete nonsense. Sometimes words hurt More than sticks and stones.
Sticks and stone may break bones, but words can break hearts.
That is the best way I have heard is phrased.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can make me believe I deserved it.
People became more aware of non-physical forms of abuse.
Nothing. Words have always been able to hurt.
I remember my school chaplain giving a sermon on exactly this phrase. He said something like, "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. It's a wonderful phrase we teach to children. The only problem is, it isn't true."
He went on to talk about how we forget the pain associated with physical scars, in fact, we may even forget the incident that gave us the scar, but there are certain moments in life where we were hurt by words that we never forget.
That was probably 30 years ago and I still remember if vividly
When I was growing up in the 1980s kids killed themselves all the time and it was blamed on “school pressures” like they could not handle the rigors of their studies. (This was an impoverished American school, so that is laughable.)
They were killing themselves due to bullying from their peers, but due to this specific phrase no one could say that, that they were so weak they let words hurt them would be an insult.
I believe the drastic change, to everyone accepting that words can end lives, happened in the late 90s, when people realized that children who were bullied could end lives other than their own, so adults had to take a notice and try to discourage bullying. And suddenly bullies of all ages saw the risk to their own lives in their bullying behavior.
I don’t believe we’ve grown nicer, it’s just that the targets of some of those “harmless words” got meaner.
Sticks and stones make shards of bone but words cut through the surface. -silent theory.
People's understanding of psychology improved, mostly.
Suicidal teenagers after being mercilessly bullied happened
As a retort to people who say that sensitivity to words is a new thing:
Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death..."
Or in long form:
James 3:5-6 "So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell."
Because we finally accepted and realized that words do hurt. We used this saying to convince ourselves otherwise.
Too many kids committing suicide because of verbal bullying and abuse, online and irl.
That phrase was always a bluff. People getting easily offended is not a new phenomenon. We've only changed what we get offended by. Ffs in the 1950s they had to have married couples sleep in separate twin beds on television because conservatives were too precious to see the sight of a married couple in the same bed.
People realised they could make money by being offended and suing people who used the wrong words.
People realized that phrase was stupid
And the people who said "sticks and stones..." got told they aren't particularly nice and turned out to be the biggest crybabies about that.
People realized that saying mean things to other people made them kill themselves
We realized it was on par with "I'm rubber, you're glue" and "I know you are but what am I?" in terms of helpfulness. Seriously, I remember people deriding the concept of words as harmless in the 90s.
The internet happened and people learned just how much words can hurt
Better mental health awareness happened.
It turns out words hurt a lot
If you've ever healed from a serious injury like a broken arm, leg, etc. And you think back on it you can remember that it was painful but it does not actually hurt in the "now". If you think back on an emotional wound like being teased, or the loss of a loved one and you think about it hard enough that pain will come back like it is happening now. Words can be the hurt that keeps on hurting while physical injuries heal and the pain is gone.
Before we lived in a time where most did not have the choice to choose, and now we do and can speak up about it.
Kids started killing themselves.
Child suicide stats started going up
People it was told to took that as a challenge in which they learned what made the person they bullied tick to find the most effective cruel was to hurt them with words. And then just piled it on thanks to social media. Bonus was if they caused the person to kill themselves, they could claim being not responsible since they never laid a hand on them.
Sticks and stones became less acceptable socially 🤷🏻♀️
Bad times create strong men
Strong men create good times
Good time create weak men
Weak men create bad times
Society became more understanding of concepts such as mental health and Scientists since have found evidence that verbal insults psychologically trigger a “mini slap to the face”. So from our perspective, that really isn’t true.
The people that used to say that grew up and realized the wounds caused by the words just took longer to manifest, but were much, much worse than any wound caused by a stick or a stone, and could never really heal.
The words did start to hurt me
We realised that words *do* hurt people. That’s what changed.
People are soft now
What changed is that the younger generation realized that mental health is IMPORTANT and words do hurt a lot more than sticks & stones because words will sit with you for eternity if you allow it.
Because it's not actually true. Words have immense impact on our lives. It's a stupid expression.
So many People acting like language and communication are irrelevant to our development hahaha I can't dude
We realized that words do, in fact, hurt quite a bit.
It came from the generations that didn’t believe in mental health and lived off of, “suck it up, buttercup”. We’ve improved in getting rid of the stigma against mental health and have become more aware/accepting of how it affects us.
Edit: although, with this, I always try to live off of the phrase: “if I wouldn’t take their advice then I won’t take their criticism either”.
People are taking mental abuse more seriously. It can be just as detrimental if not worse to your health.
What change was that people finally admitted that it was bs all along.
Pretty sure people stopped saying it after grade school.
People got way to fucking sensitive and easily offended. That’s what happened.
People usually said that through gritted teeth because the words were absolutely hurting them. Now we aren't gaslighting ourselves and the people around us about the sheer power that words have.
People who said it frequently found out that hands and feet could also readily inflict pain.
Well the harmful words are now constantly beamed into kid's brains thanks to an always-connected world.
You were able to ignore harmful words said in person by leaving the situation, you can't really do that effectively now. Cyber bullying really changed the game I think. That coupled with an influx of youth suicides might have made people take another look at this phrase, and attempt to retool it to focus on the ones perpetuating negativity and such.
In a perfect world I think it's a good phrase to operate under, but I've been targeted by a troll group before and even though I knew they were bottom feeders, it was still anxiety inducing. I thought I could ignore it but after being told to kill myself for what felt like the millionth time , I kinda felt like maybe I just should. It's weird what constant attacks can do to my usually strong confidence.
For what it's worth, this was when I was much younger and didn't realize how easy it is to just turn off notifications for basically everything, now when/if that happens I think I'm better prepared. But because of that experience I will want to teach my young ones that words can hurt, and that's okay, while providing them tools to help cope with that or something.
Because they got punched in the face for being obnoxious until they realized that while words don't hurt physically, they can cause consequences that did in fact hurt.
Context was lost, this was something to say to a bully whos words had no meaning. Not someone who is spreading your secrets or starting a religion etc.
People realized that reputation and appearances matter, and not defending yourself against slander makes you look like you agree with it
People realized that language is a tool just like anything else in life and are being more careful about how language is used against them. I think we've realized that certain words and language go beyond hurting people's feelings as they perpetuate injustice in the real world.
Talking about your feelings became socially acceptable.
Words can induce others to break your bones with the aforementioned sticks and stones.
The fact that it's not true and is just an excuse to negate a person's feelings.
We started having a greater understanding of just how damaging words can be whether or not you’re “mentally tough” or whatever older generations believed.
It was never true and we just recently realized that.
It’s always been a lie.
because it was always a BS statement
I think people have become more open with expressing how words actually make them feel.
Because words do hurt.
Well, once you tell everyone where the object of those words lives, and where they work, and go to school, and who their parents are and then encourage strangers to not just join in but also dare them to see how far they can go....all from the comfort of your own home...I think things took a change for the worse.
Back in the day, when I could smack the shit out of your ass because you had to be in my face to talk shit, people tended to not be such dicks.
Psychology suggested otherwise.
People finally understood that mental health is a real thing, and that anyone telling them to accept verbal abuse are assholes or bullies
Sounds kinda obvious, why are you even asking that lol
You got old
People realize words hurt.
It's a trick to fool bullies into thinking they're wasting their time. Words always have some non-zero impact even if it isn't very high.
Despite what the nursery rhyme says, words do hurt.
Nobody ever believed that did they?
We stopped pretending that the only wounds that matter are physical wounds. We stopped self medicating anxiety and depression with excessive alcohol as a society. We (or some of us) started actually giving a dam about others.
It was never true. Words inspire murders, words start wars.
Words have always hurt or have the potential to cause real pain. For example, even if Marie Antoinette shrugged off the abuse hurled at her it wouldn't have stopped the French people from taking her head. They despised her THAT much because pamphlets and whispering campaigns slandered and libeled her character.
That said - and as an aside - she did engage in counter-revolutionary activities like writing to her brother for military assistance, which in and of itself is treasonous and warranted punishment. But regular people disliked her more because of damaging lies like "Let them eat brioche" versus *actual* treason, which was revealed long after hating on the Queen of France became popular.
So yeah, words can kill.
People realized it's bullshit. Words _do_ hurt.
Everyone realized it was complete bullshit.
Everybody realized that it's a lie
Bones can be re-set and with some physiotherapy and time, a person can generally regain full-function without pain in 6ish months.
A person’s psyche and self-worth can take much, much longer to recover from vile words.
Sticks and stones can brake your bones. Words will make you think you deserved it.
Turns out I am not rubber nor are you glue.
People became week minded when society made a movement own everything. Like all the “pro” movements or “mental health awareness mouth” people now just accept everything. The world is no longer cold It’s just offended
Text trigger people now lmao
Trigger warning: this new generation is a bunch of bitches
Because we learned better. Know better do better. We know kids specifically are formative and repeated use of negative self imagery can cause massive long term harm. Not talking about do do head name calling but even that to a child of the right age seems and is bullying. We normalized bullying we didn't solve being verbally harassed.
I'm a veteran, blacksmith, ex-cowboy, and all the required tough guy stuff. When I had my first of three daughters I had a look at all the stuff I thought I knew and realized I had a lot to learn. Including the validity of old chestnuts like this one. Yes you shouldn't take other people's opinions to heart everytime, but this is used with children primarily and I have a high degree of probability based on my personal experience, that this saying is both inaccurate and harmful.
Mental illness became commen and accepted.
Sticks and stones may break my bones and those words they really hurt me
Idk about you, words hurt to emotional and sensitive people. Like me!
this all stopped when the world became sensitive
Seems there's a whole lot of sensitive peeps here, too, who are afraid of words.
Too bad, they're gonna spend a lot of time dealing with things that are easier forgotten, ignored, or proven wrong by just moving on.
Apologies that I don't have a simple answer for the OP,
But the comments confirm that people are becoming wimps.
Political Correctness came, that's what happened.
“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words—“
“He sexually assaulted me!”
Prize: Permanent stigmatization with no return of reputation, Possible criminal charges
“ Sticks and stones may break my bones but words —“
“ mommy he touched me inappropriately”
Prize: definite criminal charges, definite permanent defamation damages, possible sex offenders registry under bad faith, and you have to publicly state you are on the registry to your neighbors with the fear of their prejudice threatening your health and safety and life.
“ sticks and stones may break my bones but words —“
Prize: loss of job, loss of income, loss of installments to your 401(k), blacklisting, barring from industry advancement, unemployment, and then unemployment fraud charges.
“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words —“
“I want a divorce“
Prize: alimony charges, permanent child support payments, half of everything in every account you made joint. Prejudice by the judge in favor of the mom, sabotaged visitation rights, toxic rebounds in an effort to “move on”
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but your bones can fucking heal where your life actually can’t. But guess what, people like you and I somehow wanted words to matter. And they have, and Even if they are lies, they matter enough compared to actions to destroy our lives so that words definitely will hurt us.
That’s what changed
Society got soft
People started getting easily offended, soooo words are clearly working again.
people let words hurt them
It's still true. Only fgts disagree. Too much "anti bully zones" have corrupted the youths of today and now they're spineless. Reason why yt got rid of downvotes
Everyone got soft af and is hurt by any and all words
Everyone is a pussy now
Bullying and name calling has become more covert
What changed, is ppl becoming snowflakes, who get offended over everything. In the past, ppl were more thick skinned and just ignored what ppl said, or moved past it.
Ppl need to learn that what others say doesnt matter, and should be ignored. All that matters is how u feel, and what u think.
The pronoun game started
Police arresting people for being mean.
words started to make people commit suicide so the phrase became irrelevant
Bring back sticks and stones 2024.
It changed to Sticks and stones may break my bones but playing the victim will get me what I want.
People have gotten softer than 10-ply.
An expression I heard once and really try to live by is “try your best to not offend others but try even harder to not be offended.”
You choose to get offended by something someone says. Instead of asking people “hey what did you mean by that” we instead choose to believe they meant the worse and get offended.
I kinda wish more adults held to that idea. This victim mentality that's been trending among a certain subset of society for the past decade and a half is getting old.
What changed is that we no longer use sticks and stones regularily ( use violence to solve disputes). When we did, people barely cared about words, they were concerned with survival.
Ironically, when violence was more common, people were more polite, because beign killed over an insult was a real danger, unlike today.
Consider this, if we legalised and normalised "honor duels" (to first blood or KO, not death) people would immediately turn more polite, especially celebs and politicians.
We realized words cause people to commit suicide
Going to try an honest answer here. The most commonly used place for the quote above, at least for me, were when K was being bullied and my parents or teachers were dismissive. I would assume this is the case for many.
I spent far to long trying to deny the pain that others caused me through words. I tried to hide my suicidal thoughts and mask my pain through self depricating humor. It wasn't healthy and I began to realize whoever said " sticks and stones" originally has never gotten a paper cut or smacked upside the head with a dictionary.
As I have gotten older, I know words hurt and they often translate to "you aren't good enough". Hearing that enough begins to shape your thoughts on yourself. Through therapy, it has become about the source of the words.
I tell my kids that their peers opinion only matter if they value that peer. I also try to be a constant source of possitive affirmations. I try to take the sting out of the words and let them know it is okay to feel hurt, but it isn't okay to let the hurt fester. We address how we feel and we move on.
The people who said that were the same people who said the hurtful words.
Liberal media brainwashing people to be offended by every little thing
Here in Greece we use to say "The Tongue has no bones but can break bones"
They sticks and stones seemed to get bigger as I got older. Now they hurt.
It was never true, and the generation that got told that routinely grew up with deep emotional scars from having all their problems brushed under the rug by the people who were supposed to support them and being forced to bottle up their emotions so they struggle to make deep human connection as adults or talk to their own children like human beings.