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Electronic_Toofs_261

Assists


Craig1974

Exactly. That's the difference. Not taking anything away from him, but if Man City has possession, they are gonna feed Erling Haaland.


DexterKD

We recently played against Serbia. The one thing that was most heard around our stadium was "NO, GIVE THE BALL TO HAALAND!!!" They didn't, so we lost.


Arkslippy

Do serbians understand Norwegian though ? Maybe that was the problem.


letmeseem

Now, I don't have a doctorate in footballing, but it seems kinda important that he get the ball from time to time if they want him to score.


ThereIsATheory

Yeh I think that is how it works. Also it is my understanding that they must score more goals than the other team to win. I’m not an expert but someone on tv said it once so it must be true.


Sanityisoverrated1

Sounds like something Michael Owen would say.


ThereIsATheory

It was either him or Robbie Savage.


OliverDMcCall

Or maybe you have to score less goals. At least, that's what United seem to think.


AIMLESS_ASSASSIAN

He was doing this in Dortmund and Norway it don't matter where Haaland goes he will still produce.


tijostark

Good passes, crosses and stuff...


Gypsyjunior_69r

He looks and plays like he was conjured up in a Soviet era bio laboratory. Freak of a human/player.


shamka2010

Maybe he’s actually Ivan dragos kid?


greater_gatsby12

Physically he even resembles drago.... now here to avenge his father's legs


BannedFromHydroxy

[You read me mind mate!](https://www.reddit.com/r/PremierLeague/comments/xtqty6/seriously_what_is_the_best_way_of_stopping_haaland/iqrualf/)


RiceMac69

🤣🤣


Latter_Percentage660

He just ate like a horse as a teenager🤌🏽


destroyerx12772

I read that as "ate a horse" and somehow it sounded normal to me that he'd do that.


sillysausage619

You read correctly


Latter_Percentage660

Wouldn’t really surprise me.


belanaria

I read that too… you are not alone


MAbdullah2897

I read that three


Qeamer

Theres a Norwegian movie about him, he eats local and short traveled food like hearts and livers from animals. Then he filters all the water he drinks, healthy meat is the most important thing to him.


Latter_Percentage660

I know, I’m Norwegian and have watched both of his documentaries! He’s a healthier lad than he was in his teenage years that’s for sure.


repeating_bears

So hay and the occasional sugar lump?


Latter_Percentage660

Put a couple of carrots on that list and you’ve got it mate


Apoccy7

He feeds off the pain his dad suffered from Roy Keane


Funkymonkeyhead

“Alfie’s Revenge”


Daver7692

Blokes 100% a T-1000, I’m waiting for the day he Liquid Metal morphs around a CB who dares to try and stop him. All they do after the game is plug him into a USB port on the team bus. Dude doesn’t get injuries, he gets firmware bugs.


Arkslippy

I'm waiting for him to crash into Harry Maguire, irresistible force meets immovable (not in a good way) object. The Mushroom cloud will be visible for months in australia.


Fursan7

Harry Maguire will score an own goal before Haaland even has a chance to finish it himself.


Sanved313

Hahahahaha


MAbdullah2897

No Maguire will be the only person to stop him since he has the experience of no look defending 😂🤣


CrossXFir3

My roommate says Haaland is like an Arnold terminator and Foden looks like one of those liquid metal ones


thefruiteefrielos

Chicken, rice, broccoli and trenbolone sandwiches


sillysausage619

He wouldn't have it in sandwiches, would throw out his carb macros, he just eats it straight from the vial


simpsonstimetravel

He eats the vial, the needle and the supply for the rest of the team.


Impressive-Yam-1817

Guy scores goals like it's the only thing sustaining his life-force.


jackster77

Lasagne


jackster77

I’m serious - google it


cackiwhack

Heard that on Sky Sports earlier! His Dad cooks for him.


jackster77

Exactly!


thegreatgoonbino

If only he played for spurs.


Fricolor123321

Kevin de Bruynes balls, literally


Nomnomshibe

hol up


carrot_stickmann

Pep-" now Kevin, we have a world class player coming to city… we need you to do ooone thing"


Imaginary_Book_4189

Hold up,wait a minute, what did you say😧😧😧😲😲


Yfranc19

haaland does not feed he is an android😅😅


[deleted]

[удалено]


grehgunner

Insert if only Keane didn’t miss Alfie’s balls comment


Holycrabe

Match balls would be my guess


L_My_Name

Weetabix


CornedBeed

One day we will see the men in black come on the pitch and take him away


Outside_Break

Well yesterday they fed him United


Pranaychelsea

Idk about that, I'm laughing at people comparing Haaland with Nunez.


she-luvs-calibur999

you think nunez is better?


Pranaychelsea

Lol no. I never said that.


simpsonstimetravel

Clearly, I mean numbers don’t lie. Nunez has a headbutt where as Haaland doesn’t. Obviously the Uruguayan Lakaka is better that the football version of the terminator.


Nitimur_in_vetitum

About £462,105 per week.


seeyoujim

And anyone should have a hard time saying he’s not worth it RN


Nitimur_in_vetitum

If someone is willing to pay you, then you're worth it regardless of what anyone thinks. I was just making a cheeky joke. That being said the ROI is pretty insane. Let's not forget the supporting cast giving him the opportunities, but he is finishing with an absolutely RUTHLESS efficiency with the likes that I don't think have ever been seen. Kinda funny to look back at the unbelievable hate when he had the off match against Liverpool in preseason.


AIMLESS_ASSASSIAN

Where did you get that DOESN'T he have the same salary as KDB.


Nitimur_in_vetitum

I Googled it. I'm in the USA. Probably gave it to me in USD and I didn't see it.


4four4MN

They are feeding him Real Madrid juice.


Internetmilpool

Celltech


AirIndex

Ask Pep's doctors


Mental_Yard7579

Milk


TV-boksen

Riyads Pasta.


thunderbastard_

Eccles cakes


PhariMosk4003

What seems like everything. Man’s a robot so probably wd40


icant_helpyou

Anyone else think he looks like the guy in the painting from Ghostbusters (Original 1984)


EggheadWill

Vigo


Zestyclose-Win-4036

Bullets


Zestyclose-Win-4036

Haaland is better than scary mbappe!


frontyer0077

Raspeball/komle is what theyre feeding him. Ask any person from the west of Norway and they will confirm.


DennissSystem

Farse and Komle I guess, local food from his region in Norway


oLuciFURR

What they feeding Foden he’s the same age


Revolutionary_Oil897

Same age, different species. Foden is a human


oLuciFURR

Foden scored a hat trick too . He’s better than KDB


Jonathan-Shimshoni

I would say KDB is the best player in the league,slightly above Haaland


Ghost-1127

I think from the technical ability lens, he is surely the best atm. He is so clinical with the ball.


oLuciFURR

Foden , haaland, Rodri , gundo , silva and Cancelo all better than KDB


Jonathan-Shimshoni

POV: you don’t watch football


oLuciFURR

Nor do u . KDB has never won player of the month he’s overrated trash .


Jonathan-Shimshoni

Won Premier League Player of the season twice in the past 3 years


oLuciFURR

Never player of the month tho . Only gets it at the end of the season because people feel sorry for him and he’s ginger


Ghost-1127

Yes all great players but you didn’t read my comment. I’m a fan of Foden and Harland but I don’t think either can control the ball, or pass with as much precision as KDB.


oLuciFURR

KDB has never won player of the month, he’s overrated people just feel sorry for him cuz he’s ginger and a Chelsea reject


Ghost-1127

That’s the weakest point I’ve seen made over debating skill.


Revolutionary_Oil897

Foden had a great game. Haaland is a different category, it looks like he will do this regularly. He's more machine than man right now.


Snoo-51

this is getting old


ThdClickk

When was the last time we seen a striker do what he’s doing m?


brodieman2k

No it isn’t


kitchen-chick001447

😂😂. Nobody got any idea.


iguanawarrior

Food


Vamacharin

Fish and chips


Mahommed267

That boy's feasting on those assists like candy's falling from the sky!


The_Half_Sac

Passes


y_uvi_10

God dang good balls, quite literally.


analoguehaven

Footballs and cash


Legendarybbc15

Chicken and rice


Mtownswag

Small Anglo Saxon children


Ashamed-Draft3049

Footballs and FFP rules


lots_of_punctures

polarbrød mæ brunost


Grim-Reaper-0403

He’s on the chip butty with some hp diet


bcraig8870

He’s strong to the finish ‘cos he eats his spinach, he’s Erling the scoring man.


JustAllRegrets

He eats goalies and CBs


STILETT0_exists

That full English is supernatural


sub2pewdiepieONyt

Goals and the tears of opposition supporters.


SAD10M4NE

Kebab


BOSZ83

The Children of Man U fans.


cononutbunsman

Nordic Salmon


No_Doubt_About_That

Weetabix


Larryhooova

He is fuelled by a steady diet of meat, potatoes and vengeance for his father.


SpecificDry6723

He runs on electricity since he's an android


jesterwester

Goals, mostly. People can talk about him getting drip fed tap ins but he just has that goal sense that only the true elite have. He’s just in the right spot, every time. The height, the speed, the power and a ridiculously talented midfield around him. 50+ this year and goodness knows what will happen when he starts getting the synergy you get playing with the same group for a period of time. De Bruyne just has to put the ball in the air somewhere near the box these days.


pooperderapper

Every team in the prem


Brilliant_Lead4298

He is a monster, fr. Currently the best player of the season.


PoopyFruit

Apparently he was 250/1 to get 6 Prem hat tricks this season, I found out too late, gutted.


80005000

Heart of the bull: https://youtu.be/iQyDDrXfyvA


greater_gatsby12

You are what you eat.... so i assume he's being fed different gravy


Riedbirdeh

Corn 🌽 a big lump with knobs!


Bashtone514

Goat


CouldNotLoad04

Mega bites


mikeldmv

He’s just determined to become as good as the greatest forward in the world, Darwin Nunez


[deleted]

Crack cocaine


BoomerNorway

Fårikål and Lapskaus Pinnekjøtt at Jul


WaterfallOfficial

Balls


abbaspappa

They feed him fantastic passes and he never miss. KDB and Haaland together is unstoppable. The only thing to stop them are injuries


aGermmyGermm

De bruyne's through balls


Xed3

Maybe he can break the record of messi 2012 with 92 goals


suyog_12

Premier league defenders


arabia777_

Defenders


Apostle000

Dude is running on strontium, it’s scary how fast he can blitz through players. he is like the murasakibara of football, tall fast and can run u down


SnooAdvice3592

Poor mans Sean Goater.


vvisthiccy

One bite of beans and toast in England and he decided he needed to make the big bucks to eat the better food lmao


jimmy011087

Well if that tweet of him in Sainsburys is to go by, ketchup is on the menu!


D_Grateful_D

He’s not from this Earth


Hug1985

Assist


drewP78

English Football teams atm


Admir89

Steroid pancakes


el_pa7ron

Opponents Center Backs


ComfortableWhereas88

Some 8 hour energy


blacktarrystool

Pep is a genius for buy Haaland


jsparky777

United players


Accomplished-Rise-17

Seaman


nicknicksnicky

Nothing. He was made in a lab


AFrenchMemaker

Food, obviously


OB1douknowme

He is the finishing touch to a already fantastic piece of Art. They feed him rashfords kids of manchester who hes suppose to be helping.


GStewartcwhite

The other teams and players in the PL?


killcole

Emulsified financial fair play rulings in a Huel smoothie.


OliverDMcCall

Oil.